The way you spend and save money reflects its real value in your life

Spend and invest money wisely

Let’s take a little lesson about the way you spend and save money. Remember that the way you spend and save money reflects its real value in your life. Are you using money to feel better and enjoy financial freedom? Or to fill the scarcity of your life?

Money is a hot topic, especially in tough times we’ve had, like stock market crash, recessions, and so on. 

Money not really the issues when you don’t feel right about paying yourself a salary in your business, or when you feel your partner is unfair when he says you’re the spender and he’s the saver. The issues here is what money stands for: success, control, security, confidence, self worth. However, we tend to get off that purpose and money is now used to control, dominate, hold back and marginalize people.

In her book titles The Soul of Money, Lynne Twist  discusses that oftentimes, people tend to compromise relationship with money. Lynne identifies three toxic myths that most of us have about money:

The myth of scarcity: We are made to believe that only the canniest and most aggressive contentants will win. 

The myth of more is better: We don’t have a relationship with “enough,” only with “more.” We need “more” to be complete.

The myth of that’s the way it is: Perhaps, the worst myth of all, it conditions us to be resigned and live a rather unexamined life. This is a good example: We hold garage sales because we have so many stuffs we don’t really use, only to go to the mall afterwards to shop for more.

Scarcity and Insufficiency Defined

When we feel a sense of scarcity, we feel like no matter what we’re doing, no matter how much we have, we still seem not to have enough. But Lynne said that the antidote to these myths is in moving from the You and Me scarcity perspective to the You and Me sufficiency and abundance. In this perspective, we see success and failure as something achieved or done at no one else’s perspective.

When you believe in sufficiency, you start to think that there is enough to keep you going. You have enough and you are enough.

To break free from the slavery of money, ask yourself:

1.       Where does your money go, aside from your basic needs?

2.       Why do you save?

3.       What will you feel if you buy the stuffs, other than those that you need?

4.       What is your partner’s attitude when it comes to money?

5.       What does your family think of when it comes money matters?

6.       How does this shape your own relationship with money?

7.       How would you like it to be?

8.       What’s the first step you need to do to get there?

9.       Who can help you?

Talk about your goals and expectations

You really don’t have to reach the point where you and your partner have to go through heated arguments just for the sake of money. Start a discussion while you’re both relaxed and not in the middle of an argument. Never assume you’re always right. Listen to what the other party has to say and see things in his perspective—not only yours. Even if you disagree, still, be respectful.

Try to picture things out as your big goal. What do you want to achieve? Own a house? Buy a car? Invest on a business? discuss them! If you can set small goals together, chances are, you can work it even further to achieving bigger goals. The feeling of success will eventually create a stronger bond between you two. And if you need help over money matters, ask a financial planner to help you to ease the tension and solve the problem in an objective manner.

Source: Elena Tuason-Verlee, Working Mom, April 2010 Issue